Helping others to build better relationships at work

These resources will help you understand the how different people might work well and not so well together, and to help you support others who may benefit from further understanding of themselves and others

Resilient relationships

When people enjoy their jobs and have good quality relationships in the workplace, they are likely to be more productive. If they feel good, they perform well and keep well. The COACTING Styles model gives some simple prompts enabling people to reflect on the situations and dynamics of the day. This resilience habit means people (including you) can understand how effectively they communicated with others, what others need to get the best from them at work and what you all might develop to have the best impact.

Download the Coacting Styles habit

Getting things in perspective

You can use this approach, and remind others of it, as you notice people starting to over-react or show signs of stress. The purpose of all the resilience habits is that you practise them and get good at them before you need them so that when you do need them, they have become automatic or second nature. Rising above the minor things, routinely getting things in a truer perspective will pay off enormously through more challenging times.

Download the Perspective habit

Practical Advice and Guidance on Team Building

Guidance about team building interventions and their benefits

EPS Traffic Light Tool

The Traffic Light Tool uses a set of statements for staff to answer and presents the outcome using an easy-to-understand RAG rating system. An experienced wellbeing adviser will also meet with members of your leadership team or governing body to discuss the report and develop an action plan.

Self Care

If you endorse resilience habits among your staff, it’s imperative that you are an authentic role model. This can be challenging for many managers when it comes to self-care. If you work late, rush a sandwich at your desk, send texts and emails during unsocial hours, if you’re drained and low on energy but battle on regardless, you are not role-modelling self-care habits. All of which will affect your credibility as a manager as you are giving, not living, the messages. Talking about self-care and making your self-care visible will give your people permission to do the same. People who keep well are productive and able to deliver good work.

Download the Self-Care habit


Resources for Employees

You can encourage your staff to use the tools and advice in the Employee section of this site.


Displaying the EqualIIse sheet on a noticeboard, on your desk, in meetings for example, will give all the right messages around a respectful attitude at work. Using the Big i, little 'i' and equalIIse vocabulary with your people enables everyone to address tensions in themselves and others more easily. “I’m feeling little 'i' to your Big 'i' here. How can we get back to equalIIse now?

Sharing situations where you weren’t in the equalIIse zone and discussing what behaviour and words would have kept you in the equalIIse zone will also make others more at ease in their reflections and insights about how to be there.

Download the EqualIIse habit


Considering consequences

This resilience habit is a great way of getting people to think beyond themselves, to think things through and to think bigger picture. Disruption, inefficiency and conflict are often just a few degrees of separation away from an action or an omission. Discussing consequences, step by step, in team meetings reinforces taking this kind of responsibility as a consistent practice:

If I do this…… , then this…. , then this……. , then this……

And if I don’t do this……, then this…… , then this ……. , then this…….

Considering Consequences is quite an eye-opener when explored in the context of values. People soon realise that the consequences of NOT living the values of the organisation have actually become the reality for many.

Download the Consequences habit