Monday
I get my first call about 5:15pm telling me about a 15-year-old girl coming to me in the next half an hour. When the referral is read out to me, I am told that she has had to look after herself for a few weeks as mum was not around. About an hour later, I get a call to stand down as the girl will be staying at her friend’s home for the night.
Tuesday
After school I’m told that the same girl will be coming to me tonight but first, she and her social worker need to pick up a few things from her own home. At 7:30pm she arrives with her social worker.
Sadly, I smelt her before I saw her coming into the house. Her social worker told me she had not eaten all day, her face filthy with dried tears and now new ones. Petrified, she sat down and immediately my little dog Parker went over to her and licked her tears away. Whilst Parker kept her company, loving all the attention and belly rubs, her social worker gave me her medical card and an update of why she was now in care.
This is the best and worst part of my job as a foster carer. The worst because this very vulnerable girl is so desperately sad about her circumstances and terrified about coming to a strange home. The best part is now identifying what this girl needs and judging what, when and how I can help her.
Firstly, I show her to her room and I show her how the shower works. I give her a big squishy, soft towel and a basket of toiletries, that I always keep for new placements. It’s at this moment when I realise, she has nothing to change into, not even some pyjamas. All she has is a very smelly school uniform.
I ask her to leave her clothes out on the landing so I can wash them for school in the morning. I notice that nothing fits her. She had cut her sleeves short so her arms could fit into the shirt and there were no armpits of the shirt as they had rotted away. This explains why she was wearing her school jumper in summer. There was no button on her school trousers and her underwear was at least four sizes too small. That’s when I made a trip to the 24-hour Asda.
I can spend £99 on an emergency placement. I bought her new underwear, trousers, a packet of white shirts as well as some pyjamas and slippers. That’s the budget blown. I added some things on a separate bill including a hairbrush and some colourful scrunches. I also picked up a new school bag, lunch box and water bottle to replace the plastic Tesco’s bag she had been taking to school.
When I come home, I discover a very clean and reasonably happy young lady tucking into her dinner. First, she tried on her new shirts which didn’t fit, so at 10:30pm I headed back to Asda. When she put on her new uniform before bed, she began to cry (again). She told me she had never had anything that fitted her so well. Once she said that, she had me going too and so we both sat there and cried together.
Wednesday
The next morning, I drove her to school where she ran up to her friends beaming. I heard her say, “Oh my God, I didn’t know my life could be this good - smell me!”.
I laughed all the way home repeating what she had said to her friends, ‘Smell me, smell me!’. This is why I love doing this job! As a foster carer, I get to make this impact on a vulnerable child. To identify their most basic needs, provide them and see them thrive. It is priceless.
Thursday
At about 10:30pm in the evening, two little ones arrive. I can only describe these little people as the characters of want and ignorance from Charles Dickens ‘A Christmas Carol’. They were filthy, smelly and had skin like tissue paper. The first thing the eldest boy said was, “Are you going to feed us?”. The answer to that was obvious, of course we were going to, but it was quite sad to think this was the first thing they asked.
While my husband made them something to eat, it was bath time. The colour of the water was like a shallow puddle, a murky dull colour. Once they had eaten and were all nice and clean, it was late. They were off to a nice, warm, soft bed and as soon as their heads hit their pillows, they were out like lights.
Because they arrived at our home with only a plastic bag containing just two school jumpers, two book bags, three pairs of plimsolls and a pair of pants, you can only guess where I was going at 1 o’clock in the morning… Happily, I might add!